Imagine this: Marcus walks into your office for his first day on the job. He’s polite, early, and well-prepared. His resume shows 12 years of leadership experience, logistics management, and systems coordination. The interviews went well — he was humble, professional, and sharp. A real team player.

But by week three, his new team is concerned. He seems distant. He rarely joins the casual banter on Slack. He double-checks everything. He always asks for clear instructions, even when others are just figuring it out. Someone jokes that he’s too intense. His manager’s unsure what to do. Marcus is technically doing fine, but it feels like something’s off.

What no one realizes is that Marcus just left the only world he’s known for over a decade.

He’s not being cold, he’s being careful. In his old life, people died when assumptions were made. His tone isn’t sharp, it’s direct, because that’s how he protects his team. And the silence? That’s not disengagement. That’s the sound of someone relearning how to be understood.

Marcus doesn’t need more onboarding. He needs more understanding.

They Were Civilians Once — Why Is This So Hard?

It’s easy to assume that once someone leaves the military, they go back to normal civilian life. But here’s the thing: there is no going back.

The military doesn’t just give people jobs. It gives them structure, identity, culture, and purpose. It rewires how they communicate, how they lead, how they show up. So when that world ends, suddenly or after decades, they’re not just switching jobs. They’re reentering a world that has forgotten they were once part of it.

The systems are different. The values are different. The way people talk, make decisions, give feedback, and build relationships — it’s all different. And no one hands them a manual.

They’re not behind. They’re just on a new playing field, often without anyone explaining the rules.

3 Things You Won’t See on a Veteran’s Resume But Should Understand

Veterans bring some of the most valuable workplace traits you could ask for: accountability, mission focus, leadership under pressure, and resilience. But the path to accessing those strengths requires empathy and awareness.

They May Struggle in Loosely Structured Environments

In the military, ambiguity is dangerous. Civilian workspaces are full of it: undefined roles, vague goals, meetings without agendas. For someone like Marcus, this doesn’t feel casual. It feels like being set up to fail.

Be clear about expectations. Define roles. Share agendas. Help them understand not just what success looks like, but how your team gets there.

They Might Seem Reserved or Too Direct

Many veterans won’t immediately dive into office small talk or corporate lingo. Some will come across as blunt. That’s not a lack of tact, it’s training. In their world, clarity saves lives. In yours, it just might save time.

Don’t mistake quiet for coldness or directness for rudeness. Be open, consistent, and lead with curiosity.

They Might Not Be Great at Selling Themselves

Self-promotion feels foreign to most veterans. They were trained to prioritize the mission and the team, not their own spotlight. That means the people you hire might understate their experience or struggle to frame it in corporate terms.

Ask specific, story-driven questions like, “What were you responsible for?” or “How did your team measure success?” Then, help them translate that into civilian impact language.

How Managers and Teams Can Make a Difference

You don’t need to be a veteran to lead one well. What you need is intention.

When onboarding a veteran, don’t assume they know how the civilian system works. Think of it less like paperwork and more like orientation into a different culture.

Assign a peer to support them, not just for tasks, but for interpreting how things work in your environment. Things like, “It’s okay to push back here,” or “No one checks email after 6:00 PM,” might seem small to you, but they’re huge to someone trying to blend in.

In team settings, be mindful. Avoid comments like “Did you ever see combat?” or “That must’ve been crazy.” Instead, invite them into meaningful participation: real projects, problem-solving, and peer mentoring. Purpose builds belonging far faster than ping pong tables ever will.

And if you're managing them, consider this: veterans are often harder on themselves than anyone else will ever be. A little guidance goes a long way, but respect goes even further.

This Is Bigger Than Inclusion — It’s Leadership

Hiring veterans isn’t about charity. It’s not about ticking a diversity box or looking patriotic.

It’s about choosing people who know how to lead under pressure, who have sacrificed for something bigger than themselves, and who are now ready to bring that same strength into a new mission.

But for them to succeed, you have to see the full picture. The courage they carry. The habits they’re unlearning. The purpose they’re still searching for.

They don’t want handouts. They want the opportunity to rebuild.

When you hire a veteran, you’re not just filling a role. You’re stepping into someone’s life at a vulnerable, powerful turning point. If you show up with empathy, context, and a willingness to listen, you won’t just gain a loyal, high-performing employee. You’ll gain someone who knows what it means to lead,  sacrifice, endure, and begin again — with integrity.